Command and Conquer

This was the year I had been anticipating the most to begin. The rest of the world seemed to have high hopes for 2012 as well. In all seriousness, we need to stop believing in John Cusack movies. I like the man but the world is not ending...yet, and the same $5 bill with a name and number will not circulate the country, to end up in your unbeknownst loved one's hands five years later in an act of fate. The ringing in of a new year means one thing for most: resolutions. Since mine are normally the same and usually broken by the first week or so, I set a motto for what I wanted to accomplish this year. It is to Command and Conquer.

I want to challenge myself by being bolder and fearless when it comes to overcoming obstacles. I want to steer my life into a positive direction. I want to understand my environment(s) and adapt with strength and courage. But most importantly I want to find the balance between the love of others and a healthy love of self.

It took me a long time to come to terms with the fact that I was redoing my undergrad. As my friends were saying goodbye to the student life, I found myself consumed with more work than I had ever managed when I was acting. In enduring more school, I wasn't even sure where I was going to end up in the industry when I was done. I know what I would be good at but I wasn't sure if that would be self-fulfilling enough. I still don't know where I'm going to end up, but I vouch for experience. As I triumph over these experiences, I am more certain of what I want and what I don't want. This twenty-something decade is where many of us have so many things on the go-go-go: careers need to be established, traveling seems mandatory and we make many decisions that directly affect the rest of our lives. At what point do you stop figuring it out? You don't. You continue to create a forward momentum in what you want to come next. People say things may come to those who wait. But I believe it's the things left by those who hustle. Nothing comes without hard work.

I have been applying to internships in New York City from the start of the year. Looking through posting after posting, sending out resume after resume, and just waiting (not my strong point.) Over time, it becomes a recipe for the tedious. But part of expecting this out of myself was to believe it was going to happen. I had my first interview today for Fitness Magazine to be an intern for the fashion department. An hour later I had been offered the position. In just six short weeks I will be moving to the city where it happens, and I can't be more excited and overwhelmed. I have been craving a boost, recharge, and change in the recent weeks and being alone in the most influential metropolis in the world will hopefully put me in my place, and allow myself to find an identity (well, a more fine-tuned identity) in its vast anonymity.

In trusting myself, believing everything happens for a reason, accepting my flaws, keeping away from those who are negative energy is a wonderful start to my progression in knowing that I am heading in the right direction. After all we are nothing if not for progress.

I'm coming for you. x